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I know that communicating this way will maintain - even heighten - our level of arousal. Queen suggests (among other things) becoming more comfortable with erotic talk by talking to yourself while masturbating. If your partner has requested phone sex or dirty talk, great - but you might still want to talk about it before you start dialing, if only to reassure yourself that the timing is right and that your lover's response will be positive.

If you try this and it feels awkward to you, then you might consider taking her sage advice on overcoming verbal shyness: If you're so shy that words just won't come out, start with sounds. Otherwise, you run the risk of putting your partner on the spot, perhaps rendering him or her as tongue-tied as you're trying to learn not to be!

She felt the electricity from my pussy in her fingers.

Just when her middle finger slipped between the silky pussy hairs into the crack of my cunt, where it was so wet that she could just slide back to my asshole... Jackie came." In Chapter 11, "When Showing Off is Your Job," Carol Queen offers some valuable suggestions for people who may be interested in doing erotic talk (or any other form of sex work) professionally.

Carol Queen also addresses in this chapter the issue of phone sex clients who don't seem to know what they want: I noticed in the peep show that certain customers - usually the kinkier ones - were very clear about what their hot spots were and could give me all the cues I needed in a short period of time: "I want this, this, this, this, this, and this, and string it together and make it last less than five minutes." Then there were the ones who came in who were probably just beginning to explore their fantasies; others were simply tongue-tied. "But just asking that question is so powerful: 'What do you want?